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Britney Spears is for not for sale...well, at least her themed room isn't at the Onyx Hotel, which was sold to LaSalle Hotel Properties for $28.6 million this week. The group decided to hold onto the pop princess's hotel room and hopefully it will attract some more attention to the Bullfinch Triangle area hotel. In case you missed it, Spears invaded Boston this past fall by transforming a room into a simulacrum of her childhood room (which by the looks of it, was a futuristic brothel). This Britney specific room comes complete with various paraphernalia, like her giant signature on the wall, loads of junk food, a gold ruffled bedspread, and a 42-inch plasma HDTV for your viewing entertainment, which Bostonist suspects will now be playing a loop of her new reality show.
For those of you who missed it, Spears' show aired this past Tuesday on UPN, the network that brought us the award-winning "Homeboys in Outer Space." If you're wondering why no other network jumped at what was seemingly a paparazzi reality goldmine of Britney and Kevin's "Chaotic", the answer became clear as the sixty minute show aired.
Even the MTV editors who brought "Newlyweds" to life couldn't have saved this show, filled with three major themes. The first is Britney making stupid faces so often that Jim Carey would be embarrassed. The second is her poodle-like affection for her future ex-husband Kevin Federline (or K-Fed), who she met in a bar in L.A. on a Monday night. (Bostonist would site that fact as clue number one that he might not be that ambitious.)
Most of his appeal seems to be based on sex, which is the third theme as she proclaims to K-Fed, "Let's just **** all day." The sex talk on the show is not erotic nor thought provoking, but instead as comfortable as watching Basic Instinct with your parents. Bostonist doesn't know what is worse: how she went around her asking her entourage what their favorite sexual position was or that none of them answered, instead looking as uncomfortable and shocked as the viewers at home.
The Washington Post puts it best by saying, "A dumber downer would potentially be lethal." "Newlyweds" brought America into Nick and Jessica's home, showing them as real, likeable people.
On a final note, the show's tagline happens to be: "Can you handle our truth?" The Federlines must be huge fans of Jack Nicholson in "A Few Good Men."
Contributed by Matthew Nelson / photo courtesy of Wikimedia
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