State of the Union Speech Tonight; Stock Up on Booze

This evening, Bostonist will gather around the family television set with the Mrs. and the Toddler, hot tea by our sides and our trusty Bible close at hand, to listen to the warm words of wisdom bestowed upon us by our dear, gentle leader. And then we'll hit the sauce. Yes, tonight President Bush does his annual star turn, delivering the State of the Union address to Congress. Events like this can be sobering, especially for lefties like Bostonist in corners of the country forgotten by the party in power. So we turn to drink.

Drinking games based on the State of the Union address abound on the internet. Bostonist can't say that we have a favorite because (a) we tend not to ritualize our drinking, preferring to integrate it into everyday activities rather than make it an activity in itself, and (b) we may end up relinquishing our most basic liberties to the President, but the only way he'll exercise any control over our right to booze is when he pries the plastic party cup from our cold, dead fingers. Nevertheless, we'll offer a few local additions to your drinking game repertoire, just to make your SOTU party thoroughly Mass-tacular. So if any of the following things occurs during the speech, take a nice, healthy swig from that generous mug of bourbon you've poured yourself:

• Ted Kennedy's grim, clenched-jaw visage fills the television screen
• Justice Breyer (of Marlboro, Mass!) is shown, placid and with eyes half-closed, as always
• Mitt Romney is seen in the audience (even if it's just his hair peeking up from behind whoever's in front of him)
• The President mentions gay marriage, even obliquely (e.g. "strengthening the family")
• The President mentions Massachusetts (if this happens, ditch the cup and drink steadily from the bottle until it is empty)

Cheers!

Photo: George W. Bush and his father during a rare trip to the Northeast (New Haven, 1947).