The Strange Science of Political Nominations

Being an unabashed liberal from the unabashedly liberal Commonwealth of Massachusetts, Bostonist long ago stopped trying to figure out what motivated the President to do the things he does. (After he declined to nominate Mitt Romney to the Supreme Court, we pretty much decided there was no hope of understanding him.) But with the nomination of General Michael Hayden to head the CIA, we're absolutely certain that we see Bush's plan: As the diagram at right clearly demonstrates, he took the bald, scrunched-up head of the Sopranos' Joe Pantoliano, added a healthy serving of Jon Voight's jowly sobriety, and voila! Hayden was chosen. Clearly, the President wants a nominee who at times appears scrappy-yet-tough, and at other times is so grim and serious as to scare the living bejesus out of America's enemies just by looking at them. It's political genius.