Boston Blotter: Carpenters, Pervs, Beer

We know the Herald meant well with the following headline: "Lowell Carpenter Nails Alleged Perv." In short, a good Samaritan who happened to be a carpenter stopped another guy from romancing himself in front of little children at the ice roller rink. Nice pun, Herald.

But "nailed" has so many other meanings - the literal meaning, the Stephen Colbert meaning, the dirty meaning, that the Herald's poetic license made Bostonist take pause.

Elsewhere in the world of intriguing headlines, the BPD gaily announced that "Beer Lands Two in Jail." Bostonist responded, "That must've been a lot of beer!" So it was. According to the BPD, two gentlemen tried to take the party with them when the manager of the Junction Bar tried to close early yesterday morning. They tried to leave with a bottle of beer and refused to relinquish it when the owner tried to get it from them. An alleged assault ensued. It's just a beer, guys!

Image of the movie Beer, which has been sadly forgotten but still floats around in Internet conversations.