Sports Redux: The Green Machine

Let's just set aside the Celtics current troubles and cheer for Gerald Green, who won the NBA All-Star Slam Dunk contest with skill and some serious showmanship.

Green needed to be flashy because the All-Star events were already set in the shiny, sparkly city of Las Vegas, and he lived up to the landscape.

With Paul Pierce as his set-up man, Green competed against Orlando's Dwight Howard, Chicago's Tyrus Thomas, and last year's winner, Nate Robinson of the Knicks.

Green topped the competition in the first round. Pierce tossed it, and Green nailed it. But Robinson impressed everyone with his "little dude, big air" routine. Charles Barkley said, "Any time a little midget does something like this, you gotta give him a 10!"

In the next round, Thomas tore the net, and Howard performed the snazzy trick of slapping a sticker of his own face on the backboard during his dunk. Green had a lot to live up to.

But Green pulled it off with a scathingly brilliant comedy routine. Pierce brought out a cardboard cutout of Nate Robinson for Green to jump over, which encouraged the real, live Nate Robinson to come out as Green's obstacle. Then Green tore off his jersey to reveal a Dee Brown jersey.

As for the actual dunk, it was pretty good - Green successfully leaped over Robinson. They both advanced to the final round.

Since Robinson tuckered himself out trying to nail a bounce-and-spin in the finals, Green had no problems winning by leaping over a box prop. Everyone seemed to be rooting for the downtrodden Celtics, so it was a marvelous moment.

As for the rest of the All-Star contest, it was a Heat Juggernaut since Jason Kapono won the three-point shootout and Dwayne Wade won his second skills challenge. Oh, and Charles Barkley won his footrace with the elderly Dick Bavetta. It was a silly little gag that seemed to be inserted into the All-Star competition so people could make fun of Barkley's weight.

In other sports news, the Bruins beat the Buffalo Sabres in a shootout, 4 to 3. The game itself had plenty of drama, especially in the second period. Goalie Tim Thomas thought he stopped a Sabre goal, but the refs decided the shot was good - long after the Bruins had headed to the locker room!

And we can't seem to wash Tom Brady out of our hair. The guy is everywhere, including, well, in Bridget Moynahan's womb. Yes, it seems that Brady's ex-girlfriend is pregnant, which could lead to a) an awkward situation and b) yet another "Your Litigious Pats" post. Oh, and a side note - the Inside Track is mean! They referred to Moynahan as an "aging B-list bombshell." She's only 36 - she's not near death!

Screengrabs of Gerald Green leaping over Nate Robinson and Robinson's reaction from TNT.