--Yesterday, a guy in the North End gave police a 30-inch-long baby boa constrictor inside a Crown Royal bag. We're not sure if toting a snake in a Crown Royal bag is animal cruelty or public disturbance or what. It's definitely weird and kind of cool.

The unnamed man said he "found it on the street." The bag was also wet, and the Herald didn't know why. One can only guess. The optimistic answer would be that someone was keeping the critter in a bathtub.

--Also yesterday, two local women, Ramatu Deen of Boston and Ailina Fernandes of Quincy, allegedly attempted to lift $100,000 dollars of jewelry during a wedding at Fairmont Copley Plaza. The jewelry was part of wedding gifts to the couple and had been left in a hotel room while some guests were having brunch. Why can't we be related to these people? The bag was recovered quickly, but, according to the DA's office, some pieces are still missing. The women were maids at the hotel.

--Crime under the golden arches! Two people got shot on the Common last night at about 10 pm. A female got hit in the foot, and a man got hit in the leg at the McDonald's on Tremont Street.

--Hot tip, aspiring bank robbers. Don't wear T-shirts that everyone is going to remember, because you'll have to toss out your favorite Homer Simpson tee if you don't want to get caught.

--Two people were arrested for selling sex in Brighton. Police nabbed the individuals through craigslist. An undercover officer arranged a meeting with "Mistress Gorgeous," and police executed a search warrant instead.

All charges alleged until proven under law. Image of a boa constrictor from Wikipedia. Imagine a smaller version in a Crown Royal bag.