Date With IKEA

IKEA is already here, in Stoughton, but the blue-and-yellow behemoth might be moving even closer. The Somerville News reports that the Swedish store with the make-it-yourself furniture has applied to start construction in Assembly Square.

The arrival of the store could mean good news (new jobs!) and bad news (ugly traffic). IKEA tries to be soothing, well-organized, and clever, but the long lines at IKEA and technical furniture difficulties tend to put individuals in a fretful state. A rise of IKEA agitation in the area may prompt a corresponding rise in Massholism in the parking lot and on the streets. Oh, and the Good Time Emporium, home of pleasures legal and illegal, might have to move to Natick.

IKEA has been trying to break into Somerville for a long time. Last October, IKEA reached an agreement with its main opponents, the Mystic View Task Force. The agreement involved a new Orange Line stop at Assembly Square, which would cut down on traffic and increase actual development instead of IKEA Domination.

But the plan for an Assembly Square stop just hit a road block thanks to some old-school guv'mint red-tape, so you may have to wait a little longer for your date with IKEA.