October 3, 2007
No Fun, Part 1: No More "Party Grants" at Harvard
Bostonist heard word from Lena Chen over at Sex and the Ivy that the party was over at Harvard - literally. The Crimson soon followed up with the announcement that Harvard was cutting students off from the "Party Grant Program."
For those of you who didn't attend schools with "party grants," the Harvard Undergraduate Council used to get "thousands of dollars every week"--the Crimson's estimate--for parties. No wonder Harvard is bummed--thousands of dollars every week to lubricate one's social interaction with booze? Most other college students have to dig up change from between the sofa cushions or donate plasma just to score some Pabst Blue Ribbon.
Interim Dean David Pilbeam (lovingly nicknamed "Dean Wormer," no doubt) wrote UC representatives to say that he's fed up with the party grants funding "parties where the focus is on drinking." Isn't Harvard supposed to be smart? Where did he think that money was going? Tea and cucumber sandwiches?
Lena Chen is disappointed that fun is dead and writes, "Maybe it’s just me, but I actually think depression is going to skyrocket on this campus if the booze is taken away." Look on the bright side--the lack of funds might stimulate creativity and conversation that isn't slurred by a few too many wine coolers!
Image of John Vernon as Dean Wormer--often used as an online avatar--from movieactors.com.



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I hate Harvard ivy-trash as much as the next guy, but hey, they're paying for it, if you got it, flaunt it.