Bill Belichick wins football games, and he makes it clear that he's not looking for affection from the masses. But one comedian has decided it's time Belichick worked on his people skills.

Michael Showalter rhymes "Belichick" with "Surly Dick," and he proceeds to knock Belichick around for numerous offenses, such as wearing a "Flashdance sweatshirt" and blowing off Tony Dungy after the Patriots-Colts game.

Showalter then launches into a fantasy about what Tony Dungy should have done after Belichick blew him off:

If I was Dungy I'd have taken a swing at him and been like, "You surly dick! You think just because you rock a Flashdance sweatshirt means you don't pay me the courtesy of a quick post-game rap session, especially considering your team actually won the game!?" If I was Dungy I'd have kicked him in the balls and been like, "I'm sorry. I accidentally kicked you in the nuts when you not accidentally blew me off on national television."

The running theme of the post appears to be Belichick's continued rage even though the Patriots are clearly beating every team they encounter this season. While he shouldn't be expected to futz with his winning formula during the off season, perhaps Belichick might want to consider a summer at a charm school. There, he could practice cracking a smile that isn't painfully awkward, he could try on clothes with a little color, and he could learn to shake hands without hurting anybody.

Image of Michael Showalter's album cover. He doesn't realize that Belichick is just out of the frame, wanting to give him a famous Belichick Hug.