A fried turkey is a delicious turkey because the skin is ever-so-crispy and the flesh is meltingly moist. But Bostonist would like to issue a public-service announcement--turkey-frying is dangerous. You best know your way around propane because 'tis the season for turkey-fry fires.

Be sure to take the turkey fryer outside before you start. Essentially, you will be hooking up a vat of oil to a propane tank and dipping a whole turkey into the oil. If that oil catches fire by accident, you will witness a nightmarish tower of flame that the entire neighborhood will be talking about for years to come. You would be a lot better off if the aforementioned tower of flame shot straight into the sky instead of running into your ceiling or the roof of your garage. Anyone who considers frying a turkey on an apartment deck is a lot better off just roasting the bird in the oven.

If you are turkey-frying with a multi-tasking type, that person might try to fry the bird near the house or apartment complex. THIS YOU DO NOT DO. Pitch a fit until the person moves the fryer far away from the house.

Now that you realize you must fry the turkey outside, be sure to guard the fryer. The smell of a frying turkey is delightful - so delightful that it will attract all the dogs in the neighborhood. These dogs might knock over the vat of boiling oil in which the turkey fries. There goes your turkey, and you'll have a pack of angry dogs on your hands.

While a turkey-fry seems complicated and scary, just read the instructions, and follow them carefully. You'll be rewarded with a delectable bird.

Here's an extremely sincere video about how turkey-frying can go wrong and how to avoid trouble:

A portion of this post previously appeared on the Daily Pepper. YouTube video by mwalters.