--Handheld red laser beams can be a lot of fun, but a guy from Medford with a laser beam caused a ruckus on Saturday night when he pointed his beam at a State Police helicopter. The State Police swiftly summoned themselves, the Coast Guard, the Medford Police Department, and the Somerville Police Department to find the person. The feds are investigating.

--The man who is accused of being the "Green Line Groper" has pled not guilty. He was charged with one count of indecent assault and battery and two counts of open and gross lewdness, according to the Globe. He has also been barred from setting foot on MBTA property. So, where does the alleged groper draw the line between an accidental bump and a bad touch?

--BPD News is back and strong with the headline "RUNNING UP A BILL AND THEN RUNNING OUT NEVER A SMART MOVE." A man from Marblehead tried to skip out on a bill at An Tua Nua early yesterday morning. He was arrested for the retro-sounding charge of "Defrauding the Innkeeper."

--Operation Squeeze, which continually operates to haul in hookers, netted six men in Dorchester early Saturday. One of the men was 52. In BPD parlance, hooking in lieu of a retirement plan is never a good idea.

--Mayors Against Illegal Guns, a group to which Mayor Thomas Menino belongs, just sent a questionnaire to all presidential candidates asking what the candidates are going to do about the gun problem. Expect lots of waffling responses.

All charges alleged until proven under law. Image of a laser pointer in action from Wikipedia.