How to Cope After the Super Bowl Loss

All the Bostonists got together and thought of how to deal what is admittedly a rough day.

1. Let's start with what NOT to do. Do not under any circumstances say to anyone "It's only a game" or "There's always next year."

2. See the first rule.

3. Look to the Red Sox. At Porter, the BostonNOW newsie was handing out copies of a paper that featured The Debacle on the front cover. Rather than get punched, he offered consolation: "Go Sox! BostonNOW. Go Sox! BostonNOW."

4. Blame Menino. Everyone else does.

5. Make yourself laugh. Try a knock-knock joke:

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange Who?
ORANGE YOU GLAD YOU DIDN'T PAY $700 TO SEE THE SUPERBOWL?

6. Discover new jinxes, such as blaming the host of your Super Bowl party because he was wearing his lucky jersey instead of his lucky sweatshirt, Giselle for drinking wine during the game and not giving Tom the loving he needed to get him through, or the family dog because she wasn't wearing her lucky Bruschi jersey.

7. Create a fantasy land. In this land, the Super Bowl was cancelled due to terrorist threats, and Jack Bauer had to save the day.

8. Get some tail. They're doing it on The Craig right this minute. These are not safe for work: Exhibit A, Exhibit B, Exhibit C, Exhibit D. Most priceless line from all the exhibits? "Any ladies in the Andover area need some comforting?"

9. Look on the bright side: The Pats made it so NO ONE could say 19 and 0, now, unfortunately not even them.

Victoria Welch, Michael Femia, Vidalia Shiraz, Bailey Triggs, Jocelyn Celeste, Rick Sawyer, and Jon Petitt contributed to this post. Image of Myrna Loy, exhibiting sadness and a hangover, from The Thin Man.