April 18, 2008
Bostonist Corrected by Infant: The Brady Baby Speaks
Puzzled by a correction posted on our earlier report concerning a certain resident of New York City, his child, and his freakishly tiny lover, Bostonist tracked down the source. We have to admit: the Brady Baby probably knows what happened better than we do.
Dreamboat Baby is a surprisingly elegant blog purportedly written by Tom Brady and Bridget Moynahan's infant son. It offers an insider's perspective into Brady's life and motivations (he lost the Super Bowl so that Eli Manning might have his one wish), the alleged larcenies of Gisele Bündchen (whom the child simply calls "The Umlaut"), and the baby's own precociousness ("Guess during which sentence I was typing and made doodie.").
We are frankly aghast that we have overlooked this unusual and authoritative source. Too bad we missed the missives from inside Moynahan's uterus.
Image tagged "bostonist" by Flickr user Blue Socks.
| 
Well played Bostonist. For your service in folding like a cheap lawnchair, I shall find a high place for you in my future Ministry of Digital Information-Spreading. Right now, it's just the Hamster Dance on continuous loop. But in the future I hope for it to be a roving death squad.
I shall have to scold you once more, for missing my earlier comments on this site. Perhaps your mind was so overwhelmed by the flawless combination of logic and poetry that you temporarily repressed the memory. It happens to many people who claim not to "read my blog." It would cause them to compare every happy moment against the experience, triggering a spiraling depression; knowing the happiest you've ever been, you ever will be, can never be again.
Also, do not worry about missing the previous posts from Mother's womb. I haven't picked a place to summer yet! I've narrowed the list to mother's uterus and the Hamptons, but I just don't know if I'm feeling up to chasing those Easthampton DBags out of Westhampton. West Side Forever!