Did you show up to register at ROFLcon and realize that your chosen outfits just aren’t geeky enough? Don’t worry: Bostonist has got you covered.

If you’re not looking to make friends, J!NX offers There Is No Cheat Code To Make You Cooler. (Bostonist withholds comment on scoring one’s coolness on video game prowess.) Or be a little more accessibly insulting and let con-goers know that their ringtone sucks.

If you’re feeling less combative, sport this month’s inscrutable interweb catchphrase, The Cake Is A Lie. Or advertise your romantic side with Think Geek’s geek love poem. If you’re just plain old desperate, go for the pity-grope with Diesel Sweeties If it weren’t for Carbon-14, I wouldn’t date at all.

Oh, who are we kidding? Everyone knows the hardcore geeks make their own t-shirts, featuring programming jokes in Klingon or phrases so obscure no one actually understands why they’re funny.

T-shirt image via Think Geek.