Bostonist Books: Very Short Interviews

We've noticed a shift in the art of interviewing. Newspapers are being asked to do "more with less." A camera crew might interview somebody for an hour, but they'll only use a single quote. What happens to context? And what happens if that behavior gets worse? To illustrate our point, we emailed—and even spoke to—a few writers as a part of our new feature, "Very Short Interviews."

Here's what they had to say:

Bostonist: How are you?
John Hodgman: Fine, thanks.

Bostonist: How are you?
Dave Eggers: Scared. (Whisper) ... Was that alright?

Bostonist: You good?
Jonah Lehrer: Pretty good. I'm currently traveling, which always makes me uneasy, especially when Homeland Security takes my toothpaste. But if all you're complaining about is a missing tube of Crest, then life must be nice. Right?

Bostonist: What?
Ed Champion: Yes, you heard me correctly! The people in Washington have, after several bipartisan meetings and considerable tears, decided to replace the national transportation grid AND the economy with elephants! So not only will we have to junk our cars, but slivers of the cyclotis hide will be replacing our dollar bills. How they will deploy the elephants in the forthcoming Fannie and Freddie CEO severance packages is anyone's guess. But the elephant is fuel-efficient and this should finally permit us to get rid of our surplus peanuts. Plus, we're all going to be having a lot of elephant sandwiches to abate the food crisis, which should make Rosh Hashanah quite interesting. Environmentalists and animal rights advocates are naturally in an uproar about this. And there's the Inquirer item about Sarah Palin having an adulterous affair with an elephant, which at long last explains the "-ings" that she drops from her gerunds. (Elephants, as you know, are quite sensitive to velar plosives.) The U.S. Senate Committee on Commerce, Science, and Transportation is still working out the details on how to quell any potential stampedes along our many interstates. But if there's one thing America is capable of, it's coming together in a time of crisis.

Bostonist: What's on the plate for tomorrow?
Tao Lin: I don't know if you're being literal or not.

Bostinist: So?
Wil Wheaton: So? Shut up! You are! Stop it! MMMMOOOOMMMMM!!1

Thanks to Wil, Dave, Tao, Ed, Jonah, and John. Image source: Thomas Pennant's "History of Quadrupeds."