Need a Job? Drive a Wiener

You know you've always wanted to. Now, you can get paid for it. That's right—Oscar Mayer is hiring Wienermobile drivers. You don't have to sing the company jingle as well as a cute little kid, but you do need an outgoing personality, an enthusiasm for wieners (and other Oscar Mayer products), and a college degree—"preferably in public relations, journalism, communications, advertising, or marketing." A driver's license presumably helps as well. The company is accepting "reumés" through January 31, 2009—looks like they could use a copyeditor as well. If you're selected for the coveted position of Wiener Operator, you'll attend Hot Dog High in Madison, WI; it's sure to be a crucial addition to the "Education" portion of your resume. If you're confident about your chances, you might want to start memorizing the Hotdogger Oath:

As official Hotdogger of the celebrated Oscar Mayer Wienermobile, I salami swear to uphold the dogma set forth here, and I promise to:

Encourage wiener lovers nationwide to relish the delicacy, ketchup on the great taste of hot dogs, and give in to the craving once it's mustard. Be frank and furthermore, to be upstanding in a line for hot dogs at ball parks, barbecues, buffets, and other bashes. Journey into the streets, dachs, und ports of my community, wish well to all comers, plump and lean—and leave them with a wiener to roast about. As once I wished I were, now I am—an Oscar Mayer Wienermobile Hotdogger.

Check the Hotdogger Blog and Wienermobile Flickr Group to stay up on bun-related events, and learn about wienermobile history from the Oscar Mayer site. If you ham it up enough, maybe you'll cut the mustard and get hired. It is, frankly, a bright idea in this economy.

Photo by uberculture used under Creative Commons license.