Sports Redux: Welcome to the TD BankNorth Colosseum

People aren't going to the Garden to see basketball games these days. They're going to watch helpless individuals devoured by lions. Such was the fate of the Dallas Mavericks yesterday; they're a good team, not a great one, and were torn limb-from-limb by a hungry, determined, focused Celtics team. Thumbs down, Dirk Nowitzki, thumbs down.

The Celtics showed their fans, Dallas, and a national audience what to expect going into the spring. They ripped off a 38-point first quarter, followed it up with 36 in the second, played killer defense that had Dirk flinging shots in every direction except towards the basket, and balanced their scoring nicely (23 for Garnett, 23 for Ray, 23 for Eddie House). Though a lot of it was due to foul trouble, when Eddie House plays more minutes than Paul Pierce, you know it's a blowout. Final: 124-100.

The Mavericks feel like maybe they learned that defense wins basketball games, which would make them favorites in the West if they took it to heart. But the lesson was painful, as Dirk looked awful, Jason Kidd wasn't even worth heckling, and the Mavs picked up three technicals (one on assistant coach Dwayne Casey, one a double-T on James Singleton and Leon Powe, and one on the "Dallas Bench"; i.e., probably Mark Cuban). At least the Mavericks can take comfort in the fact that they weren't on the wrong end of the biggest Texas blowout of the week.

(Personal note: one other thing the Garden had in common with the Roman Colosseum yesterday was the lack of information. What happened to the in-game player stats on the Jumbotron? Can we fix this before the next game? Kthxbye)

The Bruins can hold their heads high after their successful trip to Montreal for the All-Star Game. After Zdeno Chara launched his 105-mph shot on Saturday, the remaining members of the B's contigent shone in the actual game yesterday. Marc Savard had 3 assists, and Tim Thomas saved 10 of 13 (for an ASG, that's good) in the third period, and stuffed Phoenix's Shane Doan and Columbus' Rick Nash in the shootout to preserve the head-spinning 11-10 win for the East.

Schadenfreude Alert: Joe Torre has a book coming out about his days with the Yankees. There will apparently be some not-so-nice stories, espcially about A-Rod. The New York press is handling this with all the decorum and sangfroid you'd expect. An anonymous friend of A-Rod's told the Post, "It's one final act of desperation," because it's not like Torre made it to the playoffs and the Yankees didn't last year or anything.