While we won’t understand the attraction of last night’s debate (really, what’s new at this point?) or why our TV’s showed a replay of Monday’s Red Sox game on Tuesday night (…oh, you mean that actually was a different game?), life must go on. Luckily, we’ve recovered enough from the fall version of Groundhog Day to find another batch of science news for this week’s Beaker Hill. No repeats, we promise! We start with the......

Every week, Boston Viral Video brings you the choicest slices of Grade-A YouTube. This week's dive into the coffers has unearthed a student film gem made way back in the good old days of 1992 at Boston University. Self-described as "a short comedy about the importance of toast in a relationship," this clip makes you question whether a piece of toast is really just a piece of toast. Is a cigar ever just a cigar?......

You might've seen ads for Ennio's show around the internet (and even right here on Bostonist). We weren't sure what to make of the bright colors and crazy costumes featured in the ads, so we thought we'd check out the show for ourselves. After spending the first few minutes of last night's show in utter bewilderment, we warmed up to Ennio and his odd combination of paper costumes with energetic lip synching. To call......

Every week, Bostonist dispatches its internet spiders to canvas the interwebs, bringing you the juiciest morsels in Boston-based viral video. As everyone in Boston is either in school, works for a school, or knows someone who does, finals effect us all. Whether it's sleepless nights writing papers or losing your favorite drinking buddy to the thesis machine, these weeks are hard on everyone. But as the workload doubles, the evidence of procrastination triples. That's why......

--Police put out a BOLO ("Be on the lookout") for a recent immigrant from Haiti who speaks no English and who has been missing since Wednesday. His name is Roc Sanon, he is 43 years old, and his photo is to the left. [BPD News] --Early this morning in Jamaica Plain on Gayhead Street, a woman was stabbed eight times and sustained life-threatening injuries. The BPD report indicates that the victim knew her attacker and......

--A student from Hingham died early this morning after "he apparently jumped out the 17th-floor window of a dormitory" at UMass-Amherst. [Boston Globe, tip board] --Governor Deval Patrick is preparing to tighten the state's belt if tax revenues don't hold steady. [AP/Boston Globe] --It took sky-high gas prices for it to happen, but more people are riding the MBTA. Now we'll see how the MBTA holds up with the rise in riders and if......

--The Commonwealth's fire marshall says that arson caused a fire that took out five businesses Tuesday in Northborough. 70 firefighters were needed to put down the flames. A five and dime that had been in operation for 50-plus years was among the casulties, which also included "an appliance store, a jeweler, a market and a bead shop." [Boston Herald] --We don't often link to college blotters (there's only so many times you can report......

Update: The BU Free Press has a piece today entitled "Frat Brothers Try to Dispel Myths." Although we were expecting them to say they actually trash Radissons, not Days Inns, some of the nicer fraternity brothers explained that a few of them engage in philanthropy. Allegedly a national convention for the Lambda Phi Epsilon fraternity turned into National-Lampoon-esque chaos at the Days Inn on Soldier's Field Road. The Allston-Brighton Tab reports that 100 people were......

--St. Patrick's Day, of course! Platinum Elite has wonderful photos and commentary from the parade. We were particularly enamored of the Elvis sighting. [Platinum Elite] --Other kudos to Pax Arcana's fond memories of the holiday. Bring the Pepto to the Purple Shamrock, folks! [Pax Arcana] --While it's cool that governor Deval Patrick is heading over to New York state to attend the swearing-in of the state's new governor, David Paterson, we're not quite sure......

--As if it couldn't get any worse for the MBTA. Hackers have been playing with the Charlie Card. [Boston Herald] --The owner of Tai Ho Restaurant, where Boston firefighters Paul Cahill and Warren Payne died, wants to reopen. It's worth remembering that the fire gathered in the ceiling because grease accumulated in the vents. [WBZ] --A task force has decided, after much back and forth, to take down the homemade signs on highways thanking......

Console yourselves, people. Go out tonight. Puppetry! The Bread and Puppet Theater launches a run of several projects at the Cyclorama, including The Divine Reality Comedy, the "family-friendly" The Divine Reality Comedy Circus, and a "cheap art" show. And, yes, there will be bread--rye brad with garlic aioli, to be precise. Boston Center for the Arts Cyclorama, 539 Tremont St., South End. Runs through February 10. Movies The Coolidge Corner Theater is celebrating the......

South End residents who are bracing for the opening of the BU Biolab, where scary germs like ebola will be studied, have a reprieve. The "National Emerging Infectious Diseases Laboratories" was supposed to open in the fall, but the National Institutes of Health has declared that its review won't be finished until "on or before" April 2009, the Globe reports. A panel had criticized the NIH in the past, saying its reviews of the Biolab......

--A Brazilian doctor pled guilty today of manslaughter after allegedly killing a woman in a botched liposuction surgery that took place in a Framingham house in 2006. However, the judge has rejected the guilty plea. [WBZ] --The elderly and disabled are understandably unhappy that the Rolling Rally will be held the same day as Super Tuesday should the New England Patriots win the Super Bowl. During a Rolling Rally, it is impossible to cross......

--A man walking on a pond in Weymouth on Sunday fell in and was rescued before freezing to death. Neighbors heard his screams and called for help. The footage of the rescue was so dramatic that it's been making the rounds on CNN. [WCVB] --The Globe displays pictures of the region's worst storms, which carry the subliminal message "Quit yer bitching." [Boston Globe] --Is Will Ferrell's "Funny or Die" tour coming to Boston College......

A recent piece of the Boston University police blotter reads like a lost, possibly porny, chapter of the fairy tale "Goldilocks and the Three Bears": A caller reported an individual was in the shower for more than two hours and was not responding to knocks on the door at 520 Park Drive at 12:41 a.m. Dec. 9. BUPD found the shower was left running with no one in it. Gee, wonder what was happening in......

Two men were arrested for allegedly assaulting two female BU students in their own dorm rooms on Sunday, and the university is cracking down on those who sign strangers into the dorms. The alleged attackers, one from Brookline and one from Chestnut Hill, convinced two female BU students to sign them into Claflin Hall--even though the students didn't recognize them, the Globe reports. The BU Free Press interviewed one of the victims, who described what......

--While the BPD's attempt to round up the city's criminal element was noble, it didn't work. Someone shot two brothers, a 12-year-old and an 18-year-old, through the window of their own home last night in Roslindale. They are in critical condition but improving. [Boston Globe, Boston Herald] --Two female Boston University students were assaulted in their beds and in their own dorm rooms early Sunday morning. [WBZ] --In Lowell early yesterday morning, a man......

--One would think that Boston would be prepared to handle snow. But it isn't a good sign when headlines read "what went wrong." [Boston Globe] --It also isn't a good sign when kids don't get home until 11:30 pm because of the weather. [Boston Globe] --A mistrial has been declared in the second trial for Alexander Pring-Wilson, who was convicted of manslaughter for the 2003 stabbing of Michael Colono in Cambridge, but who was granted......

--Only one woman at MIT this year was granted tenure. Uh, you've come a long way, baby? [Boston Globe] --In better news for gender equality, Massachusetts ranks fifth when it comes to the number of women in powerful state government positions. Women make up almost half of Governor Deval Patrick's leadership team. [Boston Herald] --Seven people were injured in a house fire in Brockton yesterday afternoon, including former Brockton city councilor George Papas. [The Enterprise]......

In October, Boston University threw down the gauntlet and declared plans to expand. Now, Boston College is one-upping BU with expansion plans of its own. BC's expansion plan rivals that of BU. BU said it would put in $1.8 billion, and BC has announced that it will spend $1.6 billion. The BC Heights reports that the money will go to construction and renovation, and 100 new faculty members will be hired. The rest will go......

--Framingham Police had to deal with a perp so drunk and unruly on Sunday that they had to hold his head still when they snapped him for his mugshot. According to the MetroWest Daily News, Sandro Romero's wild night started when police happened upon Romero's friends, who were trying to take him home. Even though they got him home, the officer involved got called back due to reports of a "screaming man." While being booked,......

Billy Joel said "Only The Good Die Young," but let's just say he has no idea what he's talking about, and only the really good die at the ripe old ages of, say, 69. So goes the news for Friday, November 30th, as Evel Knievel - a legendary stuntman who's fame hasn't been succeeded by generations to follow. One can only wonder with the speed of technology and special effects if masters of amazement......

--The National Research Council says that the federal review of the BU Biolab flunked. Future neighbors of the lab, you might want to join an opposition group or invest in a gas mask. [Boston Globe] --BU officials don't particularly care about the report. [The BU Daily Free Press] --The state appeals court overturned a 2005 reckless driving conviction for a man who drove recklessly because he had just been shot and was driving himself to......

--Yesterday, Tofucken was born! [Sushiesque] --The Greater Boston Food Bank distributed 38,000 turkeys for Thanksgiving. [Boston Globe] --A man was convicted for attempting to kill Derek Hopson, the stepfather of Boston Celtic Ray Allen, back in 2002 and 2003 in Connecticut. [Boston Globe] --The BU profs who let students bring beer to an advertising class are under investigation. [Daily Free Press] Image of Tofucken from Sushiesque.......

Two Boston University professors broke the stereotype of uptight, elbow-patched instructors last week when they let their students bring beer to their advertising class. Unfortunately, these cool professors are now in trouble. Angela Marie Latona at the Daily Free Press reports that Lawrence DeLamarter and Dave Schaefer (wait--any relation to el cheapo Schaefer beer?) let students bring beer so they could build an advertising campaign around the product. Their next classes were cancelled. That is......

--Deval Patrick has signed a bill that expands buffer zones around abortion clinics. Anyone who protests must stand at least 35 feet away from entrances and driveways to the clinic. [WBZ] --Three men are being tried for funneling profits from charity to promoting jihad. [Boston Globe] --The injury toll for yesterday's fire in Mattapan has risen to 16, and the 2-year-old baby rescued in the fire is in critical condition in the hospital. [Boston Globe]......

Comics Come Home Saturday, November 10, 7:30 pm Agganis Arena, Boston University Tickets The 13th annual Comics Come Home event, which raises money for the Cam Neely Foundation for Cancer Care, is happening this weekend. Of course, Denis Leary is hosting, and Mike Birbiglia, the ubiquitous Lenny Clarke, Artie Lange, Jim Norton, Robert Kelly, Joe Yannetty, and Pete Correale will perform. Birbiglia is a favorite in the -Ist-a-Verse and has talked to Gothamist and SFist.......

Boston city councilors Stephen Murphy and John Connolly aren't the only ones who have to learn how to get along. City councilor Chuck Turner, he of the stunning goatee, will also need to learn how to get along with Northeastern University, or vice versa depending which side you're on. Before the city council elections, Turner was angry with the school for not treating the neighborhood he represents with enough respect. He didn't mince words on......

--A man and his mother were shot while riding in a car yesterday in Dorchester. The Globe reports that Darnell Ricks Jr., 20, was hit in the arm, and his mother "appeared to have been grazed in the face by a bullet." Police have a detailed description of the alleged perps: "They were looking for three black males who appeared to be in their late teens and about 5 feet 8 inches tall. One wore......

Here's a wrap-up from the local papers about the strangest and funniest episodes of the night: Boston Herald: "A Teletubby dressed in Red Sox gear and a man naked but for a giant red, plastic beer cup costume were part of a procession that included a large number of kids in BU and Northeastern gear." Harvard Crimson: Streakers galore on DeWolfe Street. Universal Hub Commenter Molly Clare: Speaking of Harvard, "'OH. MY. GAWD. The Red......