Results tagged “johnkerry”

Jon Stewart on John Kerry: Zzzzzzzzz

John Kerry apparently wanted to be Secretary of State for President Barack Obama. Hillary Clinton got the job, and Kerry had to settle for being chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee. Nine months into Obama's term, Kerry is acting like the country's top diplomat anyway. He dashed off to Afghanistan to talk policy and elections with Afghan President Hamid Karzai. The new John Kerry, with an even higher profile, has earned the scrutiny of the funny newspeople like Jon Stewart. Last night, Stewart said Kerry met with Karzai in order to use "water boring" to get him into agree to a run-off election. Kerry is seen discussing Karzai in his usually glacial speaking style.

Bite Size News, September 25: Coakley, Kerry, Cash Edition

  • Senator John Kerry included a $20 million earmark in a Defense Department bill to fund the Edward M. Kennedy Institute for the United States Senate. [Boston Globe]
  • Martha Coakley spent lots of cash gearing up for a Senate bid even before there was an open seat to run for. [Boston Herald]

Bite Size News, August 17: A Tear in My Beer Edition

  • In response to last year's excessive tailgating (including two alcohol-related deaths), hundreds sobered up with cops instead of seeing Kenny Chesney at the New England Country Music Festival. [Boston Globe]
  • Southwest Airlines has landed at Logan. [Dallas Morning News]
  • A team from Peabody is heading to the Little League World Series tournament. [Daily News of Newburyport]
  • John Kerry: Drop That Joke!

    Senator John Kerry simply can't help himself and has, yet again, confirmed he is like a serial killer whose victims are jokes. He took on John McCain's unmentionables and the educational bona fides of "the troops" - Bostonist knows there must be more examples but we also think these two prove the point. And now, Kerry unleashed his funny bone on Sarah Palin by saying he wished she had disappeared instead of former presidential wannabe/frequent flyer/gigolo Mark Sanford. Bostonist won't lose sleep if Governor Palin stayed out of, or in, frankly, the lower 48 so Kerry's point isn't lost on our corner of the Internets. However, in light of David Letterman's skirmish with Palin it occurs to Bostonist that if Democrats give her more free publicity then her disappearance, that Kerry mentioned, from the national scene won't come to pass.

    Bite Size News, June 23: Bad Weather = Bad Business Edition

    • If your business is struggling this month, just look out the window to get the reason for it. [Boston Globe]

    Bite Size News, June 4: State, Town, Park Edition

  • Massachusetts tax collection drops in May. [Boston Business Journal]
  • Brookline is bothered by Big Brother. [Boston Globe]
  • Rumors are that a Beatle (that doesn't kill trees) is coming to Fenway Park in August. [Boston Herald]
  • http://bostonist.com/2008/08/07/worcester_to_become_a_lot_less_shad.php

    Who Loves Ya, Globe?

    John Kerry says the newspaper industry, especially the Boston Globe, is not doing well. Captain Obvious. Granted. Bostonist knows why this is happening, Senator. Trust us. Senator Kerry has scheduled hearingsanyway in May at the Senate Commerce Committee. Yes, even London is up to speed on our faltering print media.

    President-elect Barack Obama has selected Illinois Representative Rahm Emanuel as his Chief of Staff, reports say. Emanuel was an adviser to the Clinton administration. Our favorite Nantucket-rockin' senator, John Kerry, apparently wants to be the new Condoleezza Rice. John Podesta, Pete Rouse, and Valerie Jarrett are expected to be major players in Obama's transition to the presidency. No word on where Deval might fit in.

  • Microsoft opened a new research facility in Cambridge. Perhaps they'll eventually get "Obama" into Word's spell-check. [Mass High Tech]
  • The state official who was caught on video while stealing from copying machines has resigned to "spend more time with his family." [Cambridge Chronicle]
  • John Kerry finally gave a good speech -- about 4 years too late. [NY Times]

  • Although the incredibly buff (yet disabled) jake, Albert Arroyo, surmised he could avoid termination by not showing up to work; the Boston Fire Department is still kicking his gluteus maximus to the curb. [Boston Channel]
  • TMZ has some exclusive photos of John Kerry getting down with taking photos with college students in Nantucket. We hope he wore his flip-flops. At the "political" party, a girl clad in a green dress buddied up to Kerry and hogged the Bud Light, while her friends made excellent use of penis straws.

  • Congrats to Christopher’s of Maynard for their repeat victory in yesterday's Chowderfest. [Boston Herald]
  • -- It's official. Bostonist reported back in April that the Longfellow Bridge is falling apart, which is clear to anyone who walks across it. As of Friday the sidewalk facing Back Bay was closed to pedestrians to repair a support beam. And no spectators will be allowed on the bridge to watch the fireworks on the Fourth of July. [Boston Globe]

    --Six people were injured in a Jeep rollover at Stuart and Charles Streets early this morning. It isn't clear exactly what caused the Jeep to roll over, but it landed wheels up. [WCVB]

    If your pious boss looks tuckered out this morning, he was probably out late remembering Jesus' Last Supper. And if he's really quiet this afternoon from one to three, it's probably not something you did: he's reflecting on the supposed time of the crucifixion.

    Our junior Senator, John Kerry, was on a tour of Afghanistan yesterday when bad weather forced the helicopter he was in to make an emergency landing in a stretch of mountains. He had to wait for three hours, while protected by troops on the ground and a F-16 overheard, until a US convoy was able to take him back to an air base.

    --Old hotness: Late trains on the Worcester-Framingham line. New hotness: Changing the timetables so they don't look late anymore. [WBZ]

    Yesterday we focused on the negative: neither Ted Kennedy nor John Kerry nor Deval Patrick was able to help Barack Obama to a win in the Massachusetts primary. However, Atlantic blogger Matthew Yglesias slowed the rush to proclaim Kennedy's irrelevance with a helpful chart:

    Massachusetts' legendary senior Senator and national liberal icon, Ted Kennedy. Massachusetts' junior Senator and the 2004 Democratic nominee, John Kerry. Massachusetts' precedent-shattering Governor, Deval Patrick. None of the endorsements were enough for Barack Obama to win the Massachusetts primary.

    Republican presidential aspirant and former Massachsuetts governor Mitt Romney is the projected winner of the state of Massachusetts over John McCain this Super Tuesday, according to CNN. And that victory was by no means a given since Romney didn't exactly leave Massachusetts wanting more.

    People, so many people, mostly young people, people everywhere. There were so many people waiting in line for Senator Barack Obama's rally at the Seaport World Trade Center last night that the campaign turned the queue into a phone bank, handing out lists of voters and asking people to use their cell phones to plead for support. There were so many people waiting in the cold that a nearby Dunkin' Donuts had to prematurely close its doors after it sold every ounce of coffee in stock. So many people.

    --So there was this blizzard in 1978, and the blizzard was ridiculous. But a blizzard can't be that bad if you get trapped at the Garden with color TV, beer, and hot dogs. [Boston Globe]

    Bostonist saw John Kerry mingling with the functionaries at Mayor Menino's State of the City in Dorchester a couple of weeks ago, and we realized we had forgotten a couple of things about him. One, he's damn tall. Two, he's an elected politician.

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