The uteri of an undetermined number of Boston women turned themselves inside out today with the news that a Somerville man had been posing as little-known NBA player Jeff Turner on local singles' message boards. Ronnie Craven admitted today that he had been using the name of Turner, an unremarkable power forward/center who played ten seasons for the New Jersey Nets and Orlando Magic, in order to get laid. When reached at his Somerville home......

Update: KG just gave a shove to Pachulia of the Hawks, and he's been taken out. Marvin Williams of the Atlanta Hawks is officially the Number One Creep of the NBA playoffs. Just now, during the Celtics-Hawks game, Rajon Rondo broke away, with Williams after him. Williams proceeded to clothesline Rajon Rondo, wrapping his arm around Rondo's neck and throwing him down to the ground. The rest of the Celtics and their fans should be......

There's been a lot of praise heaped on Bruins goalie Tim Thomas this year, and it's all been deserved. The guy's been a huge reason why the B's are still very much in the playoff hunt. But man is mortal, and Tim looked anything but great last night in Florida, giving up four goals in 12 shots through two periods. His defense was far from blameless, but Tim's been great at covering for their mistakes.......

Is it just us, or does it seem like whenever the Bruins have the spotlight to themselves, they lose? When they play the same night as the Celtics, or Patriots, they're fine, but give everyone else the night off, and it feels like we always have to lead with a Bruins loss. Maybe it's just us. But they deserve better. They certainly deserved better last night, as they dropped a 4-3 OT game in Toronto.......

Last night was one of the strangest games we've seen in a while at the TDBG. With the unremarkable Clippers in town, the second quarter had a playoff-like intensity to it, with technicals, an ejection, and some really scrappy play. The fourth quarter showed a surprising lineup, as Doc left the second unit (House, Powe, Davis, Posey, Tony Allen) in for almost the entire time. Most surprising of all - the bench played some fantastic......

Today, we're not going to talk about YouKnowWhat XLII. Because there's nothing to talk about. Today, we're going to celebrate two big wins from our two local winter teams. (We will remind you, however, that we'll be live-blogging YouKnowWhat XLII starting 7:30ish on Sunday. Get your commentin' fingers in shape.) The Celtics were facing maybe their toughest test of the season so far. There have been Negative Nellies all over the land saying that the......

----------BEGIN TRANSMISSION---------- Gumshoes: Listen up. We have an important mission for you. Tom Brady, quarterback of the New England Patriots, is missing. New England media is asking questions. Fans are gettin' nervous. It's up to you to find him. The dossier: Thomas Brady. Grew up in California. Attended Michigan. Plays in New England. Cavorts in New York. Likes knit caps, Stetson, white flowers, cowboy boots, and throwing touchdown passes. Keep your eyes peeled for a......

Let's say you're going to the Celtics-Timberwolves game tonight. If you're like most of the people at Celtics games these days, chances are you weren't there last year. Which is perfectly legal on your part. But there's something you should know. Most of the Timberwolves played here last year, during that long, miserable 06-07 campaign, and several of them - promising, hardworking youngsters for the most part - were sent away to make room for......

There's lots of ways to look at it. After 32 good games, we were due for a stinker. Every NBA team is competent and capable of winning any game (well, the Knicks, but you know what we mean). We had serious letdown potential after the Detroit high. Ray Allen and Big Baby were in street clothes. If any of the above consoles you, it shouldn't. The Celtics looked just God-awful last night, and suffered their......

More than any other game this season, last night's Celtics game resembled an episode of Full House. There were a lot of laughs at the beginning, some serious moments towards the end, but it all wrapped up very neatly, complete with an "awwww" track from the studio audience. Aside from the cheeseball 90's sitcom aspect, this one had trouble written all over it. A hungry Rockets team (even without Tracy McGrady), and the first game......

Hey, wasn't this West Coast trip supposed to demonstrate that the Celtics weren't quite as good as everybody thought? The last hope for the rest of the NBA to stop the Celtics in 2007, the Lakers dug into the history books, coming out in '80s-style short shorts (they ditched them at halftime) to shake things up. They also came out swinging, opening a nasty bloody cut on Kevin Garnett's forehead (KG got called for the......

As the primaries approach and now that they've given John McCain their endorsement for Republican candidate for president, the Herald has whipped off the gloves and is going after former Massachusetts governor and Republican presidential aspirant Mitt Romney. Dave Wedge ladles a heaping helping of sarcasm when describing the latest development in the Romney vs. Huckabee Catfight Extraordinaire: In an amazing coincidence, Romney’s family tale of animal kindness [in which his kids rescued some birds]emerged......

Gifts were exchanged in Foxboro yesterday. From Miami to New England: a total lack of competition. From New England to Miami: Their foots off the gas pedal and a non-humiliation. 'Tis the season in the NFL. The Pats jumped out to an early lead, befitting a matchup of 14-0 against 1-13. Brady found Randy Moss twice (been a while since we've heard that!), then Laurence Maroney dashed away untouched for a career-long 59 yards for......

Poor Chicago. True, the Bulls could have made things interesting at the TD Banknorth Garden on Friday night if they'd actually shown up ready to play. But we imagine that they knew, as they sat in the locker room before warmups, that the Celtics weren't going to let anyone speculate about Boston's ability to bounce back from a loss. The guys in green were going to come out hard against anyone they faced - and......

One of the most remarkable things about the Celtics' remarkable turnaround is that NBA players actually want to come here. You may remember the lure of playing in Boston almost got Reggie Miller off his couch, and now there's talk that future Hall-of-Famer Gary Payton called his agent the other night and said he'd like to come to Boston. Now, this is amazing news for Bostonist. For years, our favorite non-Celtic players in the......

Boston Celtic Kendrick Perkins might miss today's game against the Sacramento Kings because a bed attacked his toe. No kidding. Even the AP just let Perkins tell the story of the headboard that tried to take his toe: I was asleep. I guess whoever put my bed together didn't put it together right when I moved, so one side of my bed fell. My bed was tilted, so I got out of my bed to......

Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee is gaining appeal among Republicans thanks to his hard-right views, his ability to lose weight, and Chuck Norris. Obviously, this has former Massachusetts governor and presidential aspirant Mitt Romney thoroughly freaked out because Romney has spent boodles of money and has less to show for it. All Huckabee had to do was lose weight and gain an action star. Hence, Romney has unleashed an attack ad. However, we think Romney......

TO: The Rest of the NBA (address not shown) FROM: The Little Nine (littlenine@celtics.com) RE:Remember Us? --- Hi everyone. It's the Little Nine here. You know, the "supporting cast" that was going to be the one thing holding the "Big Three" back from romping all over the NBA this year? Almost to a man, the papers and the Internet said that Pierce, Allen and Garnett would play well, but they had no support and no......

Remember when Celtics-Lakers games used to mean something? In the Sixties, the Celtics championship road seemed to always end with a victory over LA. In the Eighties, the Bird-Magic schism divided the NBA right down the middle, but the Lakers took two out of the three Finals in which they went head-to-head. The rivalry even has its own Wikipedia page. Alas, for the last 20 years or so, the cachet has been long gone. While......

Josh Beckett got to hoist the championship trophy, ride down Boylston on the duck boats, and will get a huge ring in the spring. He earned the Sports Illustrated commemorative issue cover, the champagne and beer showers, and the reputation for serving as the ace among aces in October. He had a rich season, so we're hoping that such a reminder helps as C.C. Sabathia is toasted as the American League's newest Cy Young winner.......

You may have heard that the Patriots are undefeated, the only team so remaining in the NFL, and are causing many a sleepless night among the '72 Dolphins champagne brigade. It may not be as flashy - it may not even last 'til tomorrow - but the Boston Celtics enjoy a similar distinction. With their brushing off of the Hawks last night, combined with the Clippers' (!) loss to Detroit, the C's begin today as......

The Celtics are pleased to announce that they've added an extra level to the bandwagon, and it's poised to start its run tonight at the Garden against Washington. This is the original bandwagon, mind you; not the auxiliary bandwagons the team expects to roll out over the course of the season. Naysayers (and there are some) point out that the supporting cast around Ghidorah is untested and unreliable. OK, whatever. So their starting point guard,......

Unusually quiet on the local sports scene yesterday. Sure, the World Champion Red Sox dispersed to the talk show circuit. At various times last night, and for the next few days, you can see members of the hometown team doing walkons with Letterman, Leno, O'Brien, "The Daily Show", "Nightline", "The NFL Today", "Thomas the Tank Engine", "The Iron Chef", "CSI: Miami", and "Deadliest Catch". Check your local listings. But in terms of actual, on-the-field, recappable......

With rare exception, the Tampa Bay Devil Rays is a different team when Scott Kazmir is on the mound. But on Tuesday night, the Red Sox was also a different sort of team - one that came back for only the second time in 43 games from a deficit heading into the eighth inning. Yeah, that's right. The Sox were down late in the game and they actually came back to win, 2-1. The game......

Green Kool-Aid is our favorite flavor. (Yes, Green is a flavor.) We've been chugging the semi-sour variety of it for three years now, as Danny Ainge has told us that we'd been assembling key parts for a magical youth movement that would lead the Celtics back to glory. And we've sipped the ultra-sour variety for a month, trying to figure out what kind of a youth movement features a creaky 32-year-old shooter. But today, the......

As fans, we can afford to be capricious. That's why the Kevin Garnett-to-the-Celtics rumors, which seemed way too expensive back in June when we thought we were building for the future, have us a little giddier now. ESPN is reporting that the trade talks are starting to swirl around again; the deal would still involve Al Jefferson, Theo Ratliff (who is the Celtics MVP based on how much everyone lusts after his expiring contract), and......

How would you have scripted this comeback? How would you write the pivotal scene in a movie about a promising young pitcher whose career is threatened by cancer surgery, but comes back less than a year later to light a needed fire under his first-place team? You probably would have written it to be against the Yankees. But other than that, it was a storybook night for Jon Lester, who tamed Cleveland to the tune......

Remember May? When this kind of thing happened all the time? The Red Sox and White Sox played a close, competitive game for six innings. Then the Chicago bullpen melted down in a big way, and the good Sox found themselves on the right end of a 11-2 win. The Red Sox had a 2-1 lead going into the sixth, when a J.D. Drew RBI double and a Coco Crisp RBI single gave Kason Gabbard......

Perhaps the blue shirts calling the shots at Fenway Park on Friday night were just bitter that they couldn't hang out in Harvard/Hogwart's Square with several thousands of their closest Harry Potter fans. Maybe they were concerned that J.D. Drew would further aggravate his hamstring by running all the way around the bases. We'd even like to think that they were just curious about whether Terry Francona would get himself thrown out of a game......

Summer had officially come to Fenwarts, but the mood was anything but cheery. Professor Schillbedore was still missing and presumed in rehab. Harry Potter still dreaded his potions class, but now wasn't pleased with Defense Against the Dark Arts, either. The new teacher, Professor Matsuzaka, started the term with much promise, but lately had struggled in class, unable to cast even a simple Chicagous spell to stop a pair of animated white socks. And Voldemort......