The Good Time Emporium, which closed its doors for good this weekend, holds a hallowed place in the Boston Blotter hall-of fame. (This Bostonist will never forget the time that 200 patrons remembered the "reason for the season" with an impromptu Easter Sunday melee.) Were you expecting everybody's favorite go-cart/laser tag/assault and battery locale to close with a classy bow or curtsy? Good Time was not going out like that. Friday night, two drunkards......

Someone stole an Incredible Hulk statue that was outside a movie theater in Lowell in honor of the latest "Hulk" movie. The Lowell Sun, last seen on Bostonist mixing it up with Ricky Gervais, made considerable hay of the affair given that the statue was wearing, "purple pants and nothing else." The Hulk's feet were bolted to the ground, as the dinosaur's were, so the perps left the feet behind. What are they going to......

Fun palace and Boston Blotter superstar the Good Time Emporium is closing as a direct result of IKEA's arrival in Somerville. Depending on whom you talk to, the Good Time Emporium was a source for genuinely clean family fun, or it was a breeding ground for Oddblotter incidents, such as the following: --Dudes who toted in two ounces of coke while leaving three rounds of ammo in the car. --Customers tangling with the police over......

A group of cyclists got an early start on Bay State Bike Week Saturday night when they beat a motorist unconscious and left a second man injured in Cambridge's Central Square, police say. According to police, a group of ten cyclists rode together down Mass. Ave. around 11pm on Saturday, swerving in and out of traffic. When a motorist swerved into traffic to avoid hitting an object, the cyclists allegedly became testy. They traded......

On Bostonist's viral video feature, we saw a gentleman compose a song dedicated to the Bruins, and he threw in a little "pee pee dance." It was cute. But someone did a not-so-cute honest-to-goodness "pee pee dance" at TD Banknorth during the Bruins' game: During the Bruins game, officers’ attentions were drawn by numerous event goers as well as event staff to the upper seat section. Officers responded there and were directed to an individual......

If the crocuses and unexpected sunshine haven't clued you in, robbery suspect Timothy Flaherty, 51 of Lawrence, has provided further evidence that spring is upon us. Last night, after allegedly robbing a victim on Beacon Hill, Flaherty led police on a wild chase through the Common and the Public Garden before diving into the Frog Pond Lagoon to elude capture. (We assume that it looks much bigger in the dark.) Police surrounded the pond......

The BPD Blotter recorded a spat between two neighbors that turned ugly last night on East Concord street when one neighbor accused the other of hooking. The hooking slur didn't make the neighbor happy, and the neighbor expressed umbrage with an unusual weapon: "The victim stated that he then approached his neighbor and told him that he needed to stop prostituting in his apartment. Per the victim, his neighbor “flipped out” and started to yell......

Last night, an alleged T Bag on a Forest Hills train must have really wanted to get caught being a perv. While in the presence of the MBTA police, aka The Grope Patrol, this gentleman, uh, threw down the gauntlet. Or at least unzipped his fly: Officers shortly thereafter observed the suspect removed his private parts from his pants, and ordered him to zip up his pants, and get off the train. The suspect stated......

A quick-thinking restaurant owner in Gloucester learned that a frozen ham can be an effective defense against a robber. On Wednesday, the restaurant owner came upon a man who was in the process of liberating meat from the owner's fridge. Not sure why he went for the meat instead of the money, but alleged robbers aren't always the brightest of bulbs. A waitress asked, "Who's that guy carrying meat down the street?" (We ask this......

A tipster let us know that the BPD had some spectacular headlines recently. Of course, Bostonist cruised over for some Oddblotter material. First up was the headline "What a Lady!" from Thursday night. Bostonist is used to seeing men emptying their bladders on trees, stop signs, sides of buildings, what have you. But we're not used to the following incident that happened in the South End: While engaged in initiating conversations with area residents, officers......

A pair of blotter items reveals that the crack cocaine in Somerville is not making residents any smarter. -- Three Somerville men were arrested when they were found in a blue van on Kingman Road trying to make crack. According to police, the men were discovered surrounded by drug paraphernalia and in possession of cocaine and baking soda. The men were reportedly trying to cook their own crack using a metal can. Bostonist doesn't condone......

Yesterday, the BPD released its daily announcements after Bostonist wrapped up its own blotter list. Many, many thanks to commenter Middleman for pointing out the following instances of criminal minds at work: Exhibit A involves a gentleman who earns points for being an honest perp. When pulled over for running a red light, he admitted that everything police found in the car--a gun, a crack pipe, and Ritalin sans prescription--was his. But he was too......

A recent piece of the Boston University police blotter reads like a lost, possibly porny, chapter of the fairy tale "Goldilocks and the Three Bears": A caller reported an individual was in the shower for more than two hours and was not responding to knocks on the door at 520 Park Drive at 12:41 a.m. Dec. 9. BUPD found the shower was left running with no one in it. Gee, wonder what was happening in......

Okay, okay, we gave the Somerville Journal a little heat for a boring blotter headline, but they definitely have our attention with the following: "Witness Says Knife Suspect Was Eating a Chicken Leg With Sauce." On January 2, two men tried to hold up a guy at a bus stop on Broadway. However, one of the perps must not have been taking the mugging too seriously, as the victim noted he was eating a chicken......

Oh, it's been so long since Somerville's Good Time Emporium, your place for go-karting and miscellaneous misdemeanors, has popped up on the blotter. But a loquacious perp had a lot to say when police arrested him early on the morning of December 29. The Somerville Journal reports that, after going to the redemption counter, the perp tried to "grab a handful of tickets that were not his." When told by an employee that the aforementioned......

Here's the top Oddblotter story of the year--just in time for Christmas! You've already seen some impressive tales, but the winning Oddblotter story of the year is a real head-scratcher. 1. The Priest Who Stalked Conan O'Brien. As if Boston priests didn't already have a bad reputation (sorry, Cardinal O'Malley, but they still do), Father David Ajemian, who had worked in Stoneham, took a shine to Conan O'Brien. The pair had a lot in common,......

4. Feel It Calling in the Air Tonight. A Phil Collins fan in the South End was really feeling the music. He could feel it, "calling in the air," so to speak, and he played it loud. Even worse, his neighbors told the BPD that it was "like this every night." He was arrested because he wasn't going to turn down that Phil Collins without a fight. Even though weirder crimes exist in this countdown,......

Bostonist is looking back on the year in weird, silly, or just plain creative crimes. Yesterday, you met some pugnacious bowlers, but you haven't seen anything until you meet a certain postal employee, overeager college students, and an exceptionally creative gravedigger. 7. Going Postal. A postal worker didn’t honor her profession when she nearly hit a detail officer. Police realized why. She was driving while on the cell phone and "with a cigarette in one......

Bostonist is looking back on the year in weird, silly, or just plain creative crimes. We'll be counting down the top 10 over the next few days so you can find out just how wild it gets around here. Today's list includes produce, assault-inducing donuts, and Big Lebowski references galore. 10. Making the Onions Grow. The Northeastern Crime Blotter is chock-full of youthful indiscretions, and one young man peed all over a stack of onions......

We're so happy BPD News is back. How could we resist an item titled "GEORGE FOREMAN WOULD NOT BE HAPPY"? Well, Tuesday night in Jamaica Plain, a fight broke out between neighbors regarding "excessive noise." The person generating the "excessive noise" didn't like hearing about the noise and did something about it: According to the victim, a heated discussion ensued during which the suspect threw a grill at the victim. Victim tells officers that the......

--The BPD arrested two people in the South End for Unlawful Possession of a Firearm. The gun wouldn't have been discovered if it hadn't accidentally gone off in the bathroom. The Herald reported that the woman who was arrested was the mother of Dontel Jeffers, the child who died at the hands of his foster mother, who was recently sentenced for the crime. Laurel Sweet writes, "Crystal Claiborn [Jeffers' mother] claimed that while aiming the......

--Framingham Police had to deal with a perp so drunk and unruly on Sunday that they had to hold his head still when they snapped him for his mugshot. According to the MetroWest Daily News, Sandro Romero's wild night started when police happened upon Romero's friends, who were trying to take him home. Even though they got him home, the officer involved got called back due to reports of a "screaming man." While being booked,......

Sunday's BPD Blotter described a woman who had a little too much to drink at an office Christmas party. Police found Kimberly M. Simon, 28, of Newton, sleeping at the wheel of her car, which was running. Further investigation revealed that she was plowed and that she got plowed at the office party. It got weird when police took Simon to the station: On arrival to the station, the suspect urinated on the floor of......

The BPD is busy, and they don't need to be dealing with some trifling pranksters, especially ones who can hear it calling in the air tonight and who ask them to hold on. Police received complaints about a man blasting music in the South End last Thursday. Usually, party music is the culprit, but the man had been possessed by the spirit of soft-rock icon Phil Collins. And his neighbors were hating it: On arrival,......

--On Saturday morning, a construction worker in Watertown went on a crazy trip to Brookline. The worker, 24-year-old Kevin Lasquade, happened to be drunk at the time. According to WHDH, Lasquade got noticed when "he allegedly hit a parked car on Beacon Street in Brookline." He also took the backhoe into a Stop & Shop lot and almost did some damage there. As if driving drunk weren't bad enough, WHDH pointed out that Lasquade didn’t......

Attention, Cambridge citizens--there is a hungry burglar in your midst, and you should protect your Thanksgiving foodstuffs. Erin Smith reports that a Berkshire Street resident thought a thief broke into his apartment on November 14. The evidence showed that "The burglar ate some leftover Shepherd’s Pie in the refrigerator, but was considerate enough to place the dirty Pyrex pie pan in the sink before leaving, according to police reports. However, the pie thief did forget......

--The person who died when a BPD cruiser struck her car yesterday has been identified as Annemarie McNally, 36, of South Boston. The officer was responding to a call when he hit her car. One witness told the Herald: "I hate to talk bad about the hurt, but she was flying. The cop was behind her. I don’t know if she hit a curb or what, but the back of her car kind of lifted.......

We're taking a brief jaunt south to Providence for this jawdropping Oddblotter entry. A woman didn't ingest her Dunkies coffee fast enough at a drive-thru, and she took it out on another woman in the drive-thru line. Laura Defazzio, 27, received her order, but she didn't drive off right away. Denise DeMedeiros, 36, honked the horn--a reasonable decision given the circumstances. Defazzio responded that she was going to take as much time as she bloody......

A woman from--wait for it--Framingham scratched her boyfriend to bits and tried to blame it on her cat on Saturday night. The MetroWest Daily News reports that 41-year-old Patricia McNulty was in a mighty bad mood: McNulty, who Ferguson said was heavily intoxicated, said they had just got a new kitten, which must have scratched the man. The officers pointed out that the scratch marks were too wide and too far apart to be from......